God misses Washington DC by miles
SUFFOLK, Va., –BobZaguy -- In an unusual display
of righteous anger, God aimed at Washington DC with his high wind tornadoes, and
missed by over 100 miles!
It wasn't clear immediately why He was off-target by such a wide margin, but
weather officials at Regent University's Baptist Weather Center were quick to
point out that they have documented evidence that this is not His first-ever
wide-margin miss with tornado strikes. God
Misses DC Cont.
City sued for providing free drugs to residents
Philadelphia, PA - Bobzaguy
Recently the Associated Press disclosed that the Environmental Protection Agency
plans on collecting 1 million pills during an Earth Day initiative aimed at the
people who live around the Great Lakes. They also stated that there is a
presence of antibiotics, anti-convulsants, mood stabilizers and sex hormones in
the drinking water of at least 24 major metropolitan areas.
In answer to this situation, a
Philadelphia press conference was called announcing a lawsuit against the city.
City Providing Free Drugs Cont.
McCain to outsource cabinet and agencies
Senate Cloak Room,
Washington D.C. –bobzaguy
Today Senator and Republican Presidential Hopeful John McCain announced that he
would, if elected president, immediately begin to outsource the cabinet and
their respective agencies.
In an informal press
conference while changing from his campaign coat to his Senate cloak for a vote
on the Senate floor, Senator McCain said that he would begin with the important
departments of State and Defense and move quickly to the Housing and Education
departments as well. John
McCain Outsource Cont.
Bush claims global warming
success
Washington D.C.
- BobZaguy
President Bush told a much smaller than usual news conference today that the
“spat about global warming has met a successful end, another mission
accomplished” for his administration, in his words. His announcement was made at
the National Weather Center, a little-known government basement office hidden
back behind Hoover’s FBI building.
The president backed
up his remarks by pointing to a series of current and recent past weather charts
from November ‘07 – February ‘08 as his first examples.
Global Warming Cont.”
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