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Presidential decree recalls American cars from Cuba

Washington DC - Bob Rohden - In a White House statement released on Sunday October 29, 2006, presidential spokespeople said that President Bush has recalled all of the 1940s and 1950s automobiles from Cuba, to be taken immediately to a naval base in Virginia. Citing national security issues, the president said that the ownership of these cars presents a clear and present danger to the people of the United States.  

The statement revealed that these cars exist in an enemy state, Cuba, and that a rather clandestine repair parts industry has sprung up to supply the needs of the car owners when their cars break down. The White House spokesperson said that the president believes this situation is depriving the US auto industry of its just profits from the lost sales of these parts. 

The President said that “even if most of these parts haven’t been manufactured in 20 years or more, the fact that people in Cuba are now making them is a clear threat.” He continued, “these Cubanos are taking away the living wages of our compadres and I intend to put a stop to it pronto.”  

On Monday morning, as the president was exercising on the White House grounds on his Segway device, he was asked what intelligence department came forward with this information. “Oh, I was phoned by Cheney’s wife to turn on PBS a few nights ago to see what they are doing down there,” he related. “There was this documentary film about all of these cars and the people who repair them. I thought, ‘Hey, that’s not the way parts are supposed to be supplied!’ so I made a couple of calls and I was right!”  

When asked why this situation threatens the security of the US, President Bush said with apparent disbelief, “You mean you think that they should get away with not buying their spare parts from legal suppliers? That’s just not the way our system is going to run. I won’t have it.”

Cuban President Fidel Castro was out of the country touring the auto factories of Mexico with President Vicente Fox and not available for comme

 

 

    05/04/2008

 

 

 

 

 

 

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News Satire Disclaimer

Red Tractor USA is a news satire and political satire web publication.   All news articles contained within are fiction, fake news,  news satire, humor, political satire or general humor and satire news.  All names used are fictional except those belonging to celebrities and politicians.   Any resemblance to the truth is a pure coincidence in cases of news satire except for all references to George W. Bush, the Bush administration, Dick Cheney, and the White House.     Red Tractor USA is intended for a mature audience.   If our site is offensive in any way, please watch Glenn Beck or  Bill O'Reilly if you are more comfortable with lies, distortions and half truths.  If you have a sense of humor and enjoy news satire and political satire, please enjoy.  

 

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