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Red Tractor USA is a news  satire and political satire site - fake news - all B.S           

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Red Tractor USA is a  news satire and political satire site - fake news - all B.S.  

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Holiday Drive-thru office party at Wendy's                           

Columbus, OH—November 16, 2007 by Bobzaguy    Do something fresh and delicious, as the ads say. This holiday season take your office party to the latest forum for fun, Wendy’s. That’s right, Wendy’s is looking for your office party business and then some.

Need a theme party? They have “The Frescata”; “The Old-fashioned Combo”; “The Super Value”; “The Baked Potato”; “The Garden Sensation”; just to name a few. And these parties can be a steal, with “The 99˘” a real deal!

Of course, you all know that the typical Wendy’s doesn’t have private dining facilities. Actually none of the 6,700+ USA Wendy’s have private dining. So, not to be dealt out without a bid, the corporate dining team came up with this idea: The Holiday Drive-through Office Party.

Get everyone in the office to carpool on party day and when you want your party to start, just drive your convoy of party cars into line at the drive-thru window. When you are asked by your host(ess), tell her(him) the name of the company and number of cars in line and which party theme you want to have. Wendy’s does the rest! It’s so easy!

As each car reaches the window, decorators trim the car with the appropriate balloons and streamers and (with advance notice) lovely strings of Italian lights as well. Then your food and drink order is given to each car and payment is received.

Once all cars are served, a special, electrified parking area is opened where you can park together and enjoy your party. Parking is at the very modest rate of $15 per office. And you can stay for a full hour without incurring any additional parking fees. Just plug in the lights and party on!

Sample pricing per person follows:

  • ·        Frescata™ Sandwich Party         $18.99 p/p

  • ·        The 99˘™ Party                   $10.99 p/p

  • ·        Old Fashioned Combos® Party      $19.99 p/p

  • ·        Garden Sensations® Salad Party   $15.99 p/p

  • ·        Super Value® Party               $13.99 p/p

  • ·        Stuffed Baked Potato(e) Party    $12.99 p/p

  • ·        Electric Parking                 $15.00/hr p/car

  • ·        Frosty™ and Beverages –one small beverage free with purchase

What a delightful way to begin the holiday season with the people who claim to be “…uncompromising in giving people what they deserve, and the defender of good taste for people everywhere.”

News Satire - North Korean President leads alternative lifestyle
Kim Jong II - Green Hair Pyongyang - While much is known about the nuclear weapons ambitions of North Korean President Kim Jong II, most Americans know very little about the actual man.   In an effort to change that, Red Tractor USA recently sent publisher David Kruk to North Korea to find out what really makes him tick. Full Story

 

News Satire - Senators vote to let Bush fight his own war

Bush To Fight In IraqWashington DC – Congress today  overwhelmingly voted to commit America’s Top Soldier to the Iraq war. By a 100 to 5 vote, the Senate overwhelmingly voted today to send George W. Bush to Iraq to let him fight his own war.    Full Story

 

 

 

 

 

    05/12/2008

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Past News Satire Headlines

American Family Flees To Mexico
Crazy Chicks
Glenn Beck Guns on campus
Greyhound Deterring Passengers and Terrorists
Marijuana Bongs Recalled
Mike Huckabee Meets Pat Robertson
Neighborhood Gone Bad
Pope Benedict's Secret
Salesman Gouges Church
Study: Trailer Trash Live In Trailer Parks
Unemployment Union Local 641 Goes on Strike
Viagra Lawsuit
Wal-Mart To Offer Sex Toys

Past Political Satire

Bill O'Reilly "I'm not a racist"
Bush Borders
Bush Economic Policy
Bush Education Program
Bush Torture Zcar
Carrot And Stick
Dick Cheney Naval Observatory
George Bush Boxing
Google NSA Join Forces
Homeland Security Duct Tape Auction
John McCain Running Mate: Danica Patrick
Laura Bush Smoking and Drinking
Waterboarding added to 2008 Olympics

Red Tractor USA Columnist

3AM Call To The White House
3AM Call To The White House
Brown Nosing
Corporate Dress Code
Excuses For Being Late To Work
Excuses for being late to work - Autumn
Looking Important at Work
Office Holiday Party Behavior
Office Holiday Party Behavior

Business Satire

Barbie Resigns From Mattel
Bathroom Time Monitored
Bekins Moving Into Future
Chinese Chopstick Recall
Depressing Office
Fast Walking Employee
Holiday Party At Wendy's
Home Depot Sales Person
Homeless Cell Phones
McDonald's Drive Through Outsourced
Problem Solving Flow Chart
Voice Mail Greeting Left on For 18 Months
Wal-Mart Layoffs
Yellow Posted Notes

Local News Satire

Arts and Crap Fair
Bike On Bus
City Sticker Controversy
College Graduate Unemployment
Corrupt Mayor
Do You Tell Your Doctor How Much You Drink?
Foie Gras Chicago
Fun banned at beach
Oil Change Parking Lot
Special Report: Things Not to do Drunk

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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News Satire Disclaimer

Red Tractor USA is a news satire and political satire web publication.   All news articles contained within are fiction, fake news,  news satire, humor, political satire or general humor and satire news.  All names used are fictional except those belonging to celebrities and politicians.   Any resemblance to the truth is a pure coincidence in cases of news satire except for all references to George W. Bush, the Bush administration, Dick Cheney, and the White House.     Red Tractor USA is intended for a mature audience.   If our site is offensive in any way, please watch Glenn Beck or  Bill O'Reilly if you are more comfortable with lies, distortions and half truths.  If you have a sense of humor and enjoy news satire and political satire, please enjoy.  

 

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