Marijuana Bongs Recalled
San Francisco CA, -
David Kruk –
Bongs-R-Us, the nation’s leading bong manufacturer, today recalled one million
bongs. The reason for the recall: The bong users have reported that they are
not getting high. College students and other marijuana smokers across the
country have flooded the company’s switchboard with calls stating that they have
been failing to achieve a good buzz since they started using the company’s
latest bongs.
Every caller reported
having purchased a Bongs-R-Us bong in 2007 via local head shops or via the
internet. All of the bongs reported have “Bongs-R-Us-2007” inscribed on the
bottom.
In addition to the
recall, Bongs-R-Us which is based in San Francisco announced today that they are
continuing to investigate the complaints. A spokesman for the company, Hans
Hammer told Red Tractor USA that “We are having a hard time getting our hands
around the situation – pardon the pun. For every customer that we have talked to
who says they can’t get buzzed using our bongs, we hear from another three that
tell us that they just got completely whacked using our fine product.”
While the company simply
suspects that maybe a real large bunch of people got ripped off by their dealers
who sold them some home grown shit, they have agreed to voluntarily recall the
2007 model bongs in an effort to retain their loyal customers. The company has
indicated that their research into the matter has shown that the majority of
complaining customers all live within or near several major metropolitan areas
in the country.
To get the other side of
this story, Red Tractor USA recently visited several head shops in San Francisco
to look for customers familiar with the bongs. Most of the customers we spoke to
were reluctant to discuss the issues. One customer, who wished to remain
anonymous, told Red Tractor USA “I’m glad that they are recalling the bongs. I
was really starting to get bummed out by my lack of a buzz when using my
Bongs-r-us bong.”
At the University of
California-Santa Barbara, one of the country's leading party schools–accprdomg
to the Princeton Review, many pot smokers were observed tossing their Bongs-R-Us
bongs into a large box located on fraternity row.
Several students, who
also wished to remain anonymous, told Red Tractor USA that “At the beginning of
the school year most of us were getting like totally stoned with these bongs but
lately we had noticed that it has been increasingly difficult to get a good buzz
on using these Bongs-r-us bongs.” Many of the university’s students reported
they will just roll joints until they get their new bong as part of the recall.
When asked if the problem
could be the quality of their weed and not the bong, most of the college
students interviewed for this story supported their local dealer. Their
comments were generally along the lines of “There is no way Rick (not his real
name) would sell us home-grown stuff", and "like dude, we have been buying from
him since we arrived on campus so we are sure the problem is not with the weed."
|
Washington DC, David
Kruk - The
Federal Office of Minimum Living Standards (OMLS) recently concluded a two year,
multi million dollar study of mobile trailer parks. The findings of this study,
outlines how mobile home trailer parks are populated with red necks, trailer
trash. hookers, petty criminals and convicted sex offenders.
Stonecastle, Ohio- Bobzaguy -
