White House Laptop
With 300 Million Phone Numbers Found
Washington, DC- Federal investigators confirmed
today that a laptop belonging to a White House staffer was found today in a
Washington DC Starbuck’s coffee shop. The laptop is said to
have contained the phone numbers of approximately 300 million Americans

The laptop was reported missing earlier in the day by the White House’s information systems department earlier in the day. A manager at the Starbucks on Pennsylvania Avenue, across the street from the White House, reported finding the laptop this morning shortly after 9:30am today.
The Starbuck’s manager, Edward Risen, indicated that many White House staffers frequent the Pennsylvania avenue location, and that it was not the first time that a customer has left behind computer equipment.
Risen stated “Though this is for sure the first laptop we have found here that actually belonged to the White House”.
In keeping with Bush administration policy, a spokesman for the White House information systems department indicated that they could not comment on this matter, or any other matter, but that they are looking into how and why this sensitive data was removed from the White House.
Needless to say, the laptop has been retuned to the rightful owners and investigators have concluded that no information was viewed or removed from the laptop in the hours that it was missing.
By David Kruk
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