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Red Tractor USA is a news  satire and political satire site - fake news - all B.S           

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Red Tractor USA is a  news satire and political satire site - fake news - all B.S.  

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Employee leaves vacation greeting on voice mail for 18 months

Detroit, MI. 9/4/2006 - John Smith works at large American auto manufacture.   Like most of his coworkers, when Mr. Smith went on vacation he always updated his voice mail greeting with a notice of his time off and contact assistance for while he was out.     Also like most of his coworkers, Mr. Smith used to always immediately remove his vacation voice mail greeting when ever he returned to work.

Employee Leaves Greeting on Voice Mail For One Year

A while back Mr. Smith decided to break the mold and see how long he could leave his vacation greeting on his voice mail after he returned from his annual winter vacation.  Eighteen months later now, Mr. Smith believes he has set a record for consecutive days of leaving his vacation greeting on his voice mail.   This idea first came to him when he called a coworker on a Friday and her voice mail greeting still said she was on vacation even though he knew she had returned that previous Monday. 

Ever since that defining moment, Mr. Smith’s voice mail greeting has remained unchanged.   The results of this experiment have been positive.  Mr. Smith told Red Tractor USA, “I receive fewer phone calls than I used to, less solicitations, fewer assignments from my bosses and less complaints from customers.”     Mr. Smith also noted, “Provided that your greeting is generic in terms of dates that you are off, when you are actually off, you do not need to worry about changing your greeting anymore.” 

As far as he can tell, most of his eleven bosses think he is on vacation.   According to Mr. Smith, “I have been both pleased and some times shocked by the results of this tactic. At times I think the success of this is directly related to the large scale bureaucracy of our company.”    

 

 

 

    05/12/2008

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Past News Satire Headlines

American Family Flees To Mexico
Crazy Chicks
Glenn Beck Guns on campus
Greyhound Deterring Passengers and Terrorists
Marijuana Bongs Recalled
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Neighborhood Gone Bad
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Study: Trailer Trash Live In Trailer Parks
Unemployment Union Local 641 Goes on Strike
Viagra Lawsuit
Wal-Mart To Offer Sex Toys

Past Political Satire

Bill O'Reilly "I'm not a racist"
Bush Borders
Bush Economic Policy
Bush Education Program
Bush Torture Zcar
Carrot And Stick
Dick Cheney Naval Observatory
George Bush Boxing
Google NSA Join Forces
Homeland Security Duct Tape Auction
John McCain Running Mate: Danica Patrick
Laura Bush Smoking and Drinking
Waterboarding added to 2008 Olympics

Red Tractor USA Columnist

3AM Call To The White House
3AM Call To The White House
Brown Nosing
Corporate Dress Code
Excuses For Being Late To Work
Excuses for being late to work - Autumn
Looking Important at Work
Office Holiday Party Behavior
Office Holiday Party Behavior

Business Satire

Barbie Resigns From Mattel
Bathroom Time Monitored
Bekins Moving Into Future
Chinese Chopstick Recall
Depressing Office
Fast Walking Employee
Holiday Party At Wendy's
Home Depot Sales Person
Homeless Cell Phones
McDonald's Drive Through Outsourced
Problem Solving Flow Chart
Voice Mail Greeting Left on For 18 Months
Wal-Mart Layoffs
Yellow Posted Notes

Local News Satire

Arts and Crap Fair
Bike On Bus
City Sticker Controversy
College Graduate Unemployment
Corrupt Mayor
Do You Tell Your Doctor How Much You Drink?
Foie Gras Chicago
Fun banned at beach
Oil Change Parking Lot
Special Report: Things Not to do Drunk

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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News Satire Disclaimer

Red Tractor USA is a news satire and political satire web publication.   All news articles contained within are fiction, fake news,  news satire, humor, political satire or general humor and satire news.  All names used are fictional except those belonging to celebrities and politicians.   Any resemblance to the truth is a pure coincidence in cases of news satire except for all references to George W. Bush, the Bush administration, Dick Cheney, and the White House.     Red Tractor USA is intended for a mature audience.   If our site is offensive in any way, please watch Glenn Beck or  Bill O'Reilly if you are more comfortable with lies, distortions and half truths.  If you have a sense of humor and enjoy news satire and political satire, please enjoy.  

 

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